friend Send Question Free
Pamphlet About Site Contact Download
article was sent to us by: Michoel
yearning and sexual purity always go hand in hand.*
So many of us try to understand why we don’t feel Hashem , after
all, we are learning so much more than other generations and we also
do so many Mitzvos and we never had so many Yeshivot in the world’s
Our Chachamim teach us that working on Middos is what enables us to
remove the Barriers or Klippos that disconnect us from Hashem. It is
as if someone had a few sun glasses in front of his eyes, the more sun
glasses he removes , the more he is able to see the light of the sun
, and the more he can feel the heat of the light. By removing our evil
Middos we become more sensitive to the spiritual world and the Love
and Awe that our Soul feels for Hashem. Therefore we have to make sure
that when we study Torah , that it should become integrated to the point
that our character traits changes.
us also that someone who is able to control his sexual temptations is
able to control almost all other temptations. This shows us how this
sin is one of the most important and difficult to overcome. By working
on Shmiras Habris one becomes a Master in Middos and he will be able
to control all other evil inclinations.
Of all what was said on the issue of Shmiras Habris, the most important
concept that needs to be deeply understood is the fact that: Sexual
purity is what enables us to actually become truly sensitive to Hashem
, to His Torah and Mitzvos.
to me, with the help of Hashem, that so many of us are looking for answers
on how to deal with this issue. Parents feel they should not speak about
it or don’t think that their child is in danger, Rabbis don’t
want to make Shiurim on it to save the pure one’s from evil thoughts,
and kids are ashamed to go speak about it, especially if they have already
failed in this area.
Since the kids were taught that if you were Motze Zera Levatala there
is no possible Teshuva, an unconscious sadness start to fill them until
they feel horrible and abandoned, to the point where this sin becomes
my goal in writing this is to give answers on how to deal with it ,
and break the Taboo that exist. We have to be aware that today , even
the greatest Talmidim from the greatest Yeshivot fall into the Trap
of the Yetzer Hara, especially because of the internet. Today we need
to prepare the kids before it’s too late , it’s a real war,
he needs weapons.
Adults as much as children need to work on this issue with tremendous
strength. I have therefore gathered here mostly sources from Chazal
and a few tools that Rabbis or myself have found helpful. They will
not all help you, it is up to you to find which tool is for your level.
And you can also find some of your own.
As Rabbi J. Rietti mentioned to me , if you don’t start teaching
a kid about how to deal with this issue before 9 years old , it is usually
too late. I will also include some explanations of why that sin is so
destructive; one of the best way to deal with Zera Levatala is to actually
understand more about the subject. A list of books can be find at the
end of this booklet.
will have in this booklet three categories for the three actions required
1) To Know:
To know what’s the real problem going on when someone sins.
2) To Prevent: Tools to be able to come to control oneself.
3) To Fix: How those one purify himself from this sin and rectify the
THE NATIONAL LEVEL, ACCORDING TO JEWISH TRADITION, ALL THE TRAGEDIES
WE HAVE HAD THROUGHOUT HISTORY, THE SLAUGHTERS, THE WARS OF MANKIND,
ARE THE RESULT OF THE SIN OF WASTING SEED. (THE LIGHT OF
TEMPTATION IS THE MAIN TEST IN LIFE.
IT IS SENT AS A CHALLENGE TO REFINE US. (LIKUTEY
1) It’s main
consequence is that one loses his longing for His maker
and has no desire to stop. Thus spilling seed is evil in God’s
eyes because it damages the yearning for Divine closeness that the Holy
One lovingly built into your soul, as a rope to get you out of the pit.
(P13 from the book the light of Ephraim) . The only pillar of light
to illuminate and warm our hearts is that of the Torah, in particular
that of the inner dimension of the Torah (kabbalah). The inner teachings
of the Torah reveal the Love and closeness binding the Creator and the
community of Israel, His soul companion, and when you delve in this
study, a fire of love for the Most High is ignited in your heart, to
the point that nothing can deter you. (Adapted from Rabbi Luria’
into to his Bet Genazai Al HaTorah, from the book the Light of Ephraim
I thought you said that there was no Teshuvah for this
“You must never take the Zohar’s statement literally”.
There are many explanations for this harsh statement ...the fact is
that a man who has no way to experience the awe of divine greatness,
nor an overwhelming thirst for His closeness (both diminished as a consequence
of that sin), has very little motivation to repent. (from the book
the Light of Ephraim p.62).
consequences for desecrating the covenant. : The first is that
man is prevented from experiencing the Awe of God’s greatness,
as well as the longing for intimate communion. The second is that he
draws down Holy souls from Heaven and becomes responsible for their
miserable fate (p.65) ...
4) When Zera
Levatalah is done, one brings down souls that don’t have any “body”
to attach themselves to, and are therefore captive in the hands of evil
forces. Those souls are like his own children. It is the duty of the
father to rip apart their prison and take them out of the state of demonic
being. The souls are then able to go back to Heaven and incarnate into
human beings, as per the natural process of Creation. The perpetrators
can achieve this either by their own effort while in this world, or
through tremendous suffering in Gehinom after death ( p.72).
5) One should
not feel depressed having images of temptations at Holy moments such
as prayer, even if it happens on Yom Kippur, on the contrary, the fact
that this is happening at such a holy time or place is a sign that the
Yetzer Hara is being bothered and that he is trying to prevent you from
succeeding, It’s a sign that you are growing, it is a very good
sign. The Yetzer H. knows that if you stay in holiness at that moment
you are going to destroy the evil that was previously created. Therefore
when this happens , you should realize that this an opportunity of growth
: remove that image even if it comes many times, this way you will elevate
all the images that you had created in the past. And do it with joy,
sadness is tool of the evil inclination. (Rav Ron Chaya)
6) And G-d
said: It is not good for man to be alone; I will make him a helper opposite
him. (Gen. 2:18)
If man did not have this desire and did not have to control his physical
urges, he could have been created like the angels or celestial beings,
who live under the yoke of the Heavenly Kingdom. But the main delight
is from those "who live in houses of clay." They were created
with desires and with the Evil Urge, but they still fight against them
and purify and sanctify their souls. It is thus written, "I will
make him a helper opposite him." Man's helper will be that
which is "opposite him" namely the power of desire for the
opposite sex, which will tempt him but not overcome him. (by
Rabbi Yisrael of Koznitz Adapted by Aryeh Kaplan from Avodat Yisrael,
1) One has
to be constantly aware that the only way one can overcome anything in
life is because Hashem granted him the power to do so. Therefore a man
should constantly pray to the Most High to save him from those bitter
(Yesod veShoresh haAvodah).
2) One usually
come to such thought if he is bored or doesn't do any activity. Therefore
if you are always busy in learning or working you will be protected.
(Pirke Avos 2:2).
3) One should not feel bad if a immoral thought comes in his mind ,
if he start to feel guilty then there is room for sin , on the contrary
he should strengthen himself and remove it from his mind , then you
can be very happy because it is a great Tikkun to do so as explained
by the Baal Shem Tov.
4) I have
received from the mouth of the Tzaddikim that when G-d forbid a man
feels he needs to look into forbidden place, or a sinful thought and
the evil inclination burns within him (to make him transgress) , he
should vow a sum for tzeddaka and he will be saved, and thereby will
diminish the strength of the Yetzer Hara (Igra dePirka, Siman 104).
5) You can
not release yourself from your baser urges unless you loath them as
Develop abhorrence toward your urges - they can destroy both your earthly
and eternal worlds by clouding your thinking and your emotions.
By developing this hatred for your baser urges, it will be easier for
you to subdue them. There will be times that the only way you will be
able to control your urges will be with the ability to find them disgusting,
like the urge for immoral acts that are so sensually tempting. (book
:To heal the soul , essay 41, Rabbi Kalonymus Kalman Shapira (the Aish
6) When seeing
things, conduct yourself as follows: If you see a beautiful women, think
to yourself : "whence is her beauty? If she were dead she would
no longer look this way; thus where does her beauty come from? Per force
it must be said to come from the divine force diffused within her. It
gives her the quality of beauty and redness. The root of beauty, is
in the Divine force. Why then should I be drawn after a mere part! I
am better off in attaching myself to the root and core of all worlds
where all forms of beauty are to be found.
(Baal Shem Tov : Tzava'at Harivash .90)
7) Why did
they call R' Yehudah Hanassi , Rabbeynu hakadosh ? because in all his
days he never looked at the place of his Milah (Talmud Yerushalmi,
Avodah Zarah 3:1). (Never put his hand below his belt. T.Babli)
is no greater barrier to sexual arousal than closing one's eyes (Sefer
Chasidim 9), King David sang : " Turn away my eyes from beholding
vanity; and give me life in your way" (119:37).
9) He who
wants to be saved from the sin of discharging his semen in vain should
not contaminate the Covenant of his mouth and in particular will guard
it from vain conversation and Lashon haRa, because the tongue and the
membrum go in tandem and he who damages with the tongue will surely
stumble with the membrum (the Chida, Tzipporen Shamir siman 7,101).
10) If a
lascivious thought comes to one spontaneously, he should divert his
attention to a subject of the Torah, which is "A lovely deer and
a graceful doe". Lewd thoughts prevail only in a mind devoid of
wisdom (Kitzur Shulchan Aruch).
11) One should
not watch any creature copulate (Kitzur Shulchan Aruch).
12) At night
one should sleep on one's side... At supper , one should neither eat
nor drink excessively , nor eat any food that tends to heat the body
such as fat meats, cheese, eggs, or garlic. Neither should one drink
a beverage that tends to heat the body, for all these things cause the
commission of this sin. (Kitzur Shulchan Aruch).
13) One who
desires to avoid this sin should guard his mouth against obscene talk,
lies, tale bearing, slander, and mockery. He should likewise guard his
ears against listening to such talks. One should also be careful to
fulfill his vows, not worry too much, and guard himself against lewd
thoughts. Before retiring, he should engage in the study of the Torah,
or he should recite the first four chapters of Tehillim , and he should
not sleep alone in a room.
(Kitzur Shulchan Aruch).
14) If a
person has erotic thoughts and cannot banish them from his mind, he
should go for a walk until the thoughts dissipate, or he should talk
to people about other things , or he should press his toes onto the
ground and place he full weight of his body on them without leaning
against a wall (Talmud Shavuos 18a).
This will drive away all carnal fantasies. If he is sitting with company
and cannot get up because this would cause embarrassment, he should
simply press his toe onto the floor. (Rabbi Yehudah HaChasid, 400(175)).
Brachos 5a gives us three tools:
R' Levi Bar Chames said in the name of R'Shimon Ben Lakish :
... If he vanquish it ( the Yetzer Hara), fine.
1) But if not
, he should engage in Torah study ...
If he vanquish it fine.
2) But if not , he
should recite the Shema...
If he vanquish it fine.
3) But if not
, remind himself of the day of death ...
16) One way
not to come to be Zera Levatalah is to tell yourself : I'll do it tomorrow,
but not today. The next day you tell yourself the same thing , until
your urge goes away...
way is to give yourself an occupation: as soon as you start to feel
aroused, just do something you like, for example, if you love chocolate
ice cream, then go buy one and eat it , then your urge will go away
during that time.
people after sinning feel depressed and for a few days or weeks they
know their davening and feelings won’t be as good, they will feel
far from Hashem. For those people it is good to think about it , and
realise that it is not worth for a few seconds of pleasure, to be pushed
away from Hashem's light and feel depressed for so long.
that you are a Neshama not a Guf, don't let your Guf tell you what he
wants, say: I'm a Holy Neshama and want to be close to Hashem. Speaking
to your Yetzer Hara out loud is very important, it will help you externalize
him and your desire.
20) Obviously Yiras Shomayim and Ahavas Hashem are the best tools, and
one should work hard on achieving it. He should think that he is being
watched by people, angels and Hashem.
21) One should
push oneself to put himself in a situation where he won't be alone when
his desire arises.
22) One of
the greatest tool against any sin is happiness, as Chazal says: Atzvous
(sadness) is the root of all sins. From sadness the Ruach Shtus is able
to enter. (Divrey Binah 96, Biale Rebbe).
Depression and anxiety are the main cause of sexual immorality.The foundation
of the covenant lies in joy, (Likutay Maharan169).
23) The Mitzvah
of Tzitzit is a protection against the wandering of the eyes which arouses
the sexual desire. Be very careful to fulfill this Mitzwah properly...
when you wrap yourself in the Tzitzit and recite the blessing, concentrate
on the thought that you desire a life of purity governed by the holy
Nathan writes : Before speaking of the Psalms, the Rebbe said ,
"the first remedy is the Mikvah".
(Rebbe Nasson about Rebbe Nachmans Tikkun Klali)
When someone comes to purify himself, he is aided from above with a
holy soul (Zohar haKadosh 58b).
you are subjected to this test it puts you in a type of ''exile''. you
should cry out to g-d: scream and cry out to him over and over again,
like a woman in labor who cries out from the pain of her contractions.
70 times she cries out (zohar iii 249b). You must do likewise and cry
out to strengthen yourself and break your desire... (likutey moharan
26) The key to subduing and breaking your desires, and especially sexual
desires, is to strive to gain mastery of the holy tongue. This means
that you should sanctify your tongue with words of Torah and prayer
(formal prayers and your own spontaneous private prayer).
(your own native language is still considered as the Holy Tongue when
it is used to converse with G-d). Likutey Moharan 19:3
out loud is a remedy for sexual impurity (L.M 20:10)
one merely has a stray thought or fantasy it is sufficient to say these
two verses (Shema... and Baruch Shem...) But certain people are plagued
with sexual fantasies all the time. They find they cannot rid themselves
of it. In this case , they must bring themselves to tears when they
take on the yoke of heaven. They must literally weep as they say the
words Shema Ysrael...and Baruch Shem....(L.M. 36:6)
Nachman's Tikkun: Bear witness to my words. When my days are over and
I leave this world, I will still intercede for anyone who comes to my
grave, says these ten Psalms ( 16,32,41,42,59,77,90,105,137,150 ) and
gives a penny to charity . No matter how great his sins , I will do
everything in my power , spanning the length and breadth of the creation
to cleanse and protect him.
( Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom 141;see also Likutey Etzos 11,92).
Even if you can't go to his grave , the remedy can still protect you.
IF the Yetzer
Hara confronts you, drag him to the House of Sacred study, for there
he is harmless...(Tamud Babli Kidushin 30b)
30) How should
man train himself to acquire the quality of Foundation? A man
must be on his guard against the kind of speech which brings to thoughts
of sin, so that he should not be visited by a seminal emission.
Needless to say, he should not speak obscenities but he should take
care not to utter even clean words if they give rise to sexual thoughts.
And this is contained in a careful examination of the verse: 'Suffer
not thy mouth to bring thy flesh unto guilt,' this is, take care not
to suffer the mouth to give speech which can bring sin to the holy flesh,
the sign of the covenant, with seminal emission. And it is written:
'Wherefore should God be angry . . . ' Now if obscenity is meant what
is the meaning of: 'bring to guilt' seeing that this itself is 'guilt'?
But the meaning is that even if there is no sin in the actual word itself,
for it is clean, he should take care if it is able to bring about sexual
thoughts... Exceedingly great care must be taken and the main precaution
is to guard oneself from sexual imaginings. (Tomer Devorah Chapter
To another young man the Steipler Rav wrote: The only hope of a young
unmarried man is to study Torah for the sake of Heaven and to pray that
the Holy One will have compassion on him and save him from sinning.
You should not expect the rescue to happen in one or two days, however.
Yet , with time, if you persist in the deep analysis of Torah texts,
as much as your ability will allow, together with a good study-partner,
without wasting any time in conversation, you will see how your urge
for evil becomes dimmer. You will thereby succed in your Torah study,
as well as in your observance of the Torah... When you finish praying
the Amidah, before taking the three steps backward, pray that the Holy
One will rescue you, as well as all your brothers among the people of
Israel, from this most bitter of sins... (Vehayim Keddoshim... op.cit.,
p52, p153, The light of Ephraim p.109 -110).
31) To prevent
yourself having evil images look in your mind’s eye or on a paper
at the two word Holy Name :
= Destroy Satan .
THOSE HOLY NAMES CAN’T BE PRONOUCED OR ERASED !
32) or at the Holy name :
from the Sefer Taharat Hakodesh (Rav Aharon Rat).
33)The Mishnah Berurah says that one should say the three times the
word PI :
which are the heading letters of Palty (Ben Laish) and Yosef (Hatzadik),
who were the two Jews in history who were known for being able to control
their Yetzer Hara for women; as you say those three words you should
rub your forehead three times.
34) It is also obvious that placing the Holy Name YKVK
in front of you (or in your mind’s eye) will also help.
from “Tzipurim Shamir” from the Chida:
1) Always let a little light in the dark when you sleep.
2) Don’t put an under-the-belt-garment close to your head when
3) Don’t sleep with Barzel (iron) on you.
4) Fall asleep by learning Torah.
5) Say the complete Krias Shema before Chatzos (jewish midnight)
6) Look at the name YKVK black on white before sleeping.
7) Think of your father’s face in your mind .
8) Sleep with your Talith Katan (in the name of the Arizal).
be careful not to say :
9) Brachos Levatalah (Blessings in vain) .
10) Nedarim (vows, commitment) even by thought and not to fulfill them
11) Lashon Hara and Sicha Betela (Evil and Unnecessary speech).
like on Yom Kippur night it is a Segulah to read the first 4 first Psalms
of the book of Tehillim (Chazal).
37) Reviewing Mishna has the power to overcome forbidden thoughts and
bring purity of mind, in particular the Seder Taharos causes a person
to be worthy of having purity descend from heaven to assist him in his
learning , praying and Mitzvos so that they are done with greater purity
of the heart.
38) Ultimately, the only thing that helps a man give up the stumbling
block of sexual offenses is yearning for Taanug-delight right from the
Source (The light of Ephraim p.123). The more one pushes himself
to serve Hashem out of Love and to give Him pleasure, the more
he will feel that Love and pleasure to the point that no other pleasure,
even the sexual pleasure, will become insignificant.
39) In chapter 36 of Shaar Hagilgulim (p.308 in english edition) we
see that even Yosef sinned at some level that we can’t even start
to understand, he also wasted seed. The point I want to give is that
if Yosef himself, One of the Hero for controlling temptation failed
at some level, it is normal that we too should have struggle with this
sin, and one should not be depressed but fight as Yosef did. Not only
that but as Rabbi H. Ben Yosef explains : no one is better equipped
to attain the delight of G-d’s closeness than those who have tasted
the fiery lust of the outside forces connected to Yesod (Bris) , and
have turned it into a flame of holiness.
1) One of
the ways to rectify the damage is by helping others deal with this sin.
(Rabbi Mordechai Aderet) .
2) One of the ways to repair this spiritual damage is to study the Inner
Wisdom of the Torah (kabbalah) ( p.82).
3) To one boy who had essentially given up trying the Steipler Rav wrote
: An essential requirement is not to despair, G-d forbid. We must always
hope that the Holy One will help us, for as it is written: Is G-d’s
power limited? Furthermore, one who comes to purify himself is sent
help from Heaven. Another important principle is not to fall into sadness.
One who is unmarried should not think of his past till after he gets
married. He will then have time to repair (The light of Ephraim
4) In the Amidah in the blessing Mekabetz Nidchei Amo Yisrael = “Who
gathers in the dispersed of His people, Israel”, focus on Nidchei
Amo Yisrael which alludes to the sparks and the souls stemming from
the drops of keri-wasted semen that came out of man, whether accidentally
or willingly, and became absorbed and assimilated in the klipah-evil
husk. As you say this blessing, focus on gleaning them and sorting them
out by means of he holy Name .
You yourself don’t do it. You just have in mind a silent prayer
that this divine name will sort them out and elevate them... Also ,
by intertwining the letters of the Name
with the four letters of the holy Tetagrammaton , we coerce the evil
husk to spit out and return the sparks of holiness that they have swallowed,
so that these sparks can be restored to their place in holiness. (p.112)
5) As you
say the words:
(in Uva Letzion , after the Amidah ) And a redeemer shall come to Tzion
, and to those who repent from rebellion... focus your consciousness
on the initial letters
= body . Then when you say the words that follow, "
Those of Yaakov , the words of Hashem, and as for me... focus on the
initial letters =
chidren ; Think of the souls and drops of wasted semen (which are your
children) that emerged from you. Have in mind to rescue them from the
forces of evil by means of your repentance, and to return them to the
treasury of souls where they belong (The light of Ephraim p.116-117).
6) The Chida zt’l taught (Moreh Betzbaa 2.1) that when learning
Sedr Taharos, have in mind that it should be an atonement for any violations
related to Niddah, Keri and Netilas Yadayim.
7) Sefer Yesod Yosef (Tikkun #12) Still greater would be the accomplishment
if one completes 18 chapters of Mishnayos each day, starting from the
begining of each month, this you would complete the entire six section
of the Mishna every month! This is a still greater Tikkun for wasting
seed ( advice from the Arizal).
8) Sefer Yesod Yosef (Tikkun #8) explains how one chapter of Mishnayos
before retiring at night is a tikkun for the known violation of Zera
9) For a married man, one of the best way to rectify this sin is by
having relations with Holiness.
friend Send Question Free
Pamphlet About Site Contact Download